Emotions run high at Provo Library

Just a short, pictureless blog here. So on Thursday, I went to the Provo Library to get a library card. i stood in line for 5 or 6 minutes to see the woman at the desk so i could get one. When i got up there, she merely asked if i had filled out the application. i said no, i didn't know there was an application. she pointed to a table then asked for the next person in line. She was old, heartless and obviously at a dead end in her life seeing as she works at the library, so i let her meanness slide. I went to the table to fill out the application. it asked for my name, address, phone number, e-mail, and then told me i'd need a picture I.D and proof of Address. So I got in line with my application, i was going to use my driver's license as picture i.d. and my dad's blockbuster card as proof of address. I got up to the Desk again and a different, younger lady was there to help me. she asked her superior, a young man, if a Blockbuster card would work. he said "yeah, if it has the address on it" so i went to get it, but it was under my dad's name, and the one under my name was from my time in Price, PLUS it wasn't my address at all on the card but the address of the store it was issued at. So i told her it was from price and left the line to find something else. i looked at my triple AAA card, there was nothing, i found a reciept, but there was no address on that either. at last, i found an appointment slip for me... but my address wasn't on there. I looked at my social security card and my debit card also, as well as a bank statement. No luck. I finally found a paper with my dad's name and address on it (which is also my address.) So I stood in line again to ask if that would work. the young man said it wouldn't.
Then said " yeah, nope, that won't work sorry."
i said " but it's my address, too, see same last name, and same address as i wrote down"
He said as he was trying to usher me away " yeah, no it has to be your name, good old they... yeah good old the library system"

Fag. using quasi-hip, youthful terms with me won't make my address verified. The next time i went in line, needless to say, it was with the youthful girl, but she was the only one there. I am getting ahead of myself.
i left the line again and read the requirements again. i ahd to have a photo- I.D. and a proof of address that wasn't the photo I.D. so... i thought i could use my school I.D. as photo I.D. and my driver's license and proof af address. "Ha! I've got them beat at their own game now" i thought to myself. So now i got in line with the youthful girl and showed her my photo I.D. then my driver's license with my address on it. she took it and looked at it for a long time, then we had this exchange:
GIRL: have you renewed this in the past three months?
ME: what?
GIRL: have you renewed this in the past three months?
ME: my driver's license?
GIRL: yes,
ME: what?
GIRL: have you renewed your driver's license in the past three months
She was getting slightly agitated now
ME: no, why would i do that... what do you mean?
GIRL: there is an expiration date on your license, and it needs to be renewed every five years, have you renewed it in the past three months?

ME: No... i did it when i got it. i haven't had it for five years yet.
GIRL: no, i mean, in the past three months have you gotten your license renewed?
ME: no. why? is it not valid or something?
GIRL: it's not current enough
ME:why? what! it needs to be renewed every five years, the state thinks it's current enough.
GIRL: your address isn't current enough
ME: no, it is. that's the same address on my application, see
GIRL: it's policy, it's not recent enough
ME: you mean i have to renew my license every three months? that doesn't make any sense
GIRL: no, but your address needs to be three months recent
ME: why would i renew that... that doesn't make any sense. it's the same address, i promise. i still live there.
by this point she was very flustered and angry
GIRL: no, it has to be three months recent
ME: what does that even mean?
GIRL: listen, it's policy, your Address has to be three months recent.
ME: why?
GIRL: thats policy
ME: why is that policy, it doesn't make sense. i need to renew my license to get a library card.
GIRL:Listen, your address needs to be current to make sure you haven't moved. i know you haven't but this is policy. so do you get mail
ME: like paper mail?
GIRL:yes.
she was furious, but couldn't yell at me because i twas a library and she has to be courteous
ME: no i get e-mails
GIRL: you don't get like paper mail?
ME: no.
GIRL: listen, do you have a postcard, just mail yourself a postcard. that will work.
ME: okay, thanks. i don't want to be rude, like i understand it's policy, but whay do i have to renew my license, i think that's dumb
GIRL: you don't have to renew your license.
ME: you just said i did, and it sayd on the paper i need a driver's license
GIRL: you do. for your Photo I.D. and if your using your driver's license as a photo i.d. then it doesn't have to be current. but for the address confirmation, it has to be recent enough.
ME: OH!!! okay! i get it. i was using my driver's license as an address, not an i.d. okay, thanks.
GIRL: no problem


i knew it was a problem, and i knew i had infuriated her. partially on purpose too. but now i understood what she meant. i guess she's a librarian because she's not a very good communicator, so she lets books do the communicating for her. anyhow. i had run out of things to use as photo i.d. in my wallet and was thinking of just giving up, but i decided to call my mom and have her bring me my box from a ring i ordered on e-bay. that had my name and address on it. so i called her and explained my situation to her. she said immediately " Oh! like your motorcycle registration?!"
" mom i love you"
so i went out and got it, and came back down intot he library victoriously. walked up the the woman, thrust it onto the desk and demanded a library card. i then re-itterated all the hoops i had jumped through to her to prove that there was nothing i didn't cover.

i wondered if they actually wanted people to have library cards. i think secretly they only want the librarians to be able to check books out, because anyone else doesn't appreciate them the same way they do.

I also looked around and noticed about seven or eight transients checking out books. Libraries are always havens for the homeless. How do they get library cards, not having addresses and all. i guess the Food and Care coalition could vouch for them? i don't know. but i successfully got my library card. HA! i did it Provo City Library. And just for that., I will check out books and never read them!