A Smattering. (or How Adam Richman Stole My Heart and Postmodernism will Never Die)

Initially, I was going to make my next post (this one) my months-in-the-making Look-Alike Post (I have 19 couples of people, most with 2 pictures each) But then I realized it was a lot of work and i also realized that the guy who won The Next Iron Chef America ( MICHAEL SYMON) and HOWIE MANDEL looked alike, so I needed to find pictures of them... (I posted links above...look at them yourself. I'll post them all later)

So, then, after I decided to put off the labor intensive Look Alike Blog, I decided I would write a blog about how Adam Richman (right) host of Man v. Food on the Travel Channel has the best job in the whole wide world and how I want to be him when I grow up.
Really. He has the best job in the world. Bar none. You know, alot of people say firemen have noble jobs, or policemen have noble jobs... No. Adam Richaman has the most noble job I know of. He eats huge foods on T.V. He will sacrifice his dignity and his comfort merely for his love of food. Some background on this noblest of men: He got a undergrad degree in International Studies, and during his travels, he kept a 'food-journal' and logged every time he ate anywhere. He still keeps it to this day. After a while, he decided he just wanted to get up and get a masters degree from the Yale School of Drama, one of the most highly acclaimed drama schools in the country. So, he did that. God bless him! He has a show called Man v. Food, as I said before, in which he travels around the country and eats stuff! Each place he goes to centers around an EATING CHALLENGE. but before the main challenge (which has ranges from a 7 1/2 lb. breakfast burrito to an enourmous slice of pizza to extremely hot wings to 'bicycle seat sized" steak, and everything in between) He goes to local eateries of the surrounding area and eats the best foods every. he finds the most delicious, greasy, pig-outy foods and eats them for us, on T.V. so he can watch it. He gets so messy and sweaty whenever he eats, it's wonderful. He says at the beginning of every episode that he is "not a competitive eater, just a man who loves food" Amen, Adam. And it shows. Here are a few of the things he has eaten, or attempted to eat on his show.
This is a burger called 'Sasquatch' that Adam was not able to finish. The buns alone weight one pound each. It is an Eight pound Hamburger, plus all the fixins'
This Giant burrito, called the 'Burritozilla' was not even a Challenge! he just got it for fun... but he only had one bite. the crowd boo-ed him, but then a world-champion competitive eater happened to be in the house, (he's called JOEY CHESNUT) and he ate this 17 1/2 inch breakfast burrito in 3.2 minutes. WOW. Adam said, in regard to Joey: “This is huge. This is like, okay, I’m a baseball player, and randomly Babe Ruth happens to walk in while I’m eating a big burrito” And then later, looking back on the experience in his Vlog: "...a 17 inch burritozilla, which he ate in 3 minutes and 15 seconds in front of me, like a warrior. I am a nobody”the VIDEO IS HERE


“Compare the size of the beautiful child to the gigantic slice of pizza”


“you can’t take small bites with a sandwich the size of a Winnebago.” This is a typical sandwich from Primanti's. Throughout the series, you see the crew and Adam wearing shirts they got from there.

This is Adam, losing a challenge to 16 milkshakes. Food won... but in honesty, I think we all won.

Yes... those are gas masks in a kitchen. And Adam ate it. New York has the worlds spiciest curry.

these were 12 of the spiciest wings in the world. Adam had to eat them and then lick all the sauce off his fingers and then sit still with no drink of napkin for 5 minutes in order to win... he did it. The interview afterward will be posted as well... my dad pointed out that he does much better with spicy challenges than with large quantities.

This wasn't even a challenge! it was just breakfast... Seriously though, whenever I order food at a restaurant, and it comes, and it's not as big as this picture, a little part of my heart dies... Man I want his job!

That entire thing becomes a pizza... and he eats it!

Holy Moses... that is a doughnut that... I want to marry that doughnut. Seriously... I hear it's legal in Massachusetts

This is the 7 1/2 lb breakfast burrito that bested Adam, you can see the high-speed video below.


High-speed Burrito-eating. Yes, that ump-teen pound pile of food is a breakfast burrito.


Adam Fields questions after he ate the hottest wings on the planet (the aforementioned 12 wings, with a 5 minute "after-burn" in which he could not eat, drink or touch anything. Wow.


Now today, I want to ask a question, nay I wish to foster a discussion. I stumbled upon a handout that MR. BAUER gave me about three years ago. It was on Postmodernism. Re-reading it, it kind of scared me.

Postmodernism respects all things equally, Shakespeare is on par with family guy. It has no 'Canon.' And there is no one single 'norm' (i.e. white, male, straight, protestant, etc) and everything else outside is different or wrong (i.e. black, women, gays, etc.) In postmodernism, every variable is in itself it's own, correct norm. So White is just as respected as black, women as men as gay as straight as Jew as christian as T.V. as Theatre as Nascar as comic books as Prairie Home Companion as Rap, etc. (this is just one of many, many elements of Postmodernism, but now you unawares folks are a bit more in the picture, and you in-the-know folks can have your minds refreshed.)

I wrote Mr. Bauer a message that contained the following:

There was a quote on the handout that said:
" If postmodernism is the condition of contemporary culture, then all culture in our time is by definition postmodern. We cannot single out or fix a style and presume that it is distinctively "postmodernism." All we can do is observe the particular forms and relations that postmodernism takes in any particular cultural phenomenon"

then in response, we cannot single out or fix a style and presume it is definitively NOT Postmodernism... So did we kind of dig ourselves into a hole here with this whole Postmodernism thing? will there ever be anything after Postmodernism? as the handout also said " Postmodernism is a process still underway" and so... is it so adaptive that nothing can break out of it?

I mean, there are insanely distinct and different theatre styles, like Moises Kaufman's Tectonic theater project, Robert Wilson, and Richard Foreman, all of whom are extremely distinct in their styles, yet all are lumped under postmodern, simply because of when they happen to be alive?

If someone wrote a manifesto saying "We are officially no longer postmodern, we are instead ___" would they still be considered Postmodern because of how adaptive Postmodernism is, and how Un-defined they are? (Postmodernism has no manifesto, neither a defined beginning or rules for being such. There are simply guidelines and general rules to look for) I mean, people have done that, right? Neo-futurists? I think? and they are Neo-futurists, They wrote a manifesto, but they are still postmodern... New Ism's are born because there is a need for change... well lots of people have seen the need for change and have made that change (Moises Kaufman, for example) and yet, since Postmodernism is so 'great' and adaptive, they can't get away.

Does this make sense?

I guess i'm just wondering your all your take on this and also asking if there will ever be a time when there is no longer a postmodernism, or if it will just be the elastic "ism" that will adapt to and incorporate everything...

Will Postmodernism Ever Die?

I really do want to know what all you think about this. please leave a comment, lets discuss.